10:38 PM
Friday, August 27, 2004
i'm still alive!! haha... i'm super tired so i'll keep this short... prelims are ok so far... well besides the gp of course... math was on thursday. it was pretty ok but i couldn't do quite a number of questions... i should be able to pass but obvoiusly i'd want more than just a pass... today was physics practical day... all went well i guess... managed to finish everything on time... whew!! my results were reasonable so... hope all goes well!! *prays*
Shh, it's..here..
12:39 PM
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
gayle sent us this through the halmm mailing list... it made me cry alright...
The Cab Ride
Twenty years ago, I drove a cab for a living. It was a cowboy's life,a life for someone who wanted no boss. What I didn't realize was thatit was also a ministry.
Because I drove the night shift, my cab became a moving confessional.Passengers climbed in, sat behind me in total anonymity, and told meabout their lives. I encountered people whose lives amazed me,ennobled me, and made me laugh and weep. But none touched me more thana woman I picked up late one August night.
I was responding to a call from a small brick fourplex in a quiet partof town. I assumed I was being sent to pick up some partiers, orsomeone who had just had a fight with a lover, or a worker heading toan early shift at some factory for the industrial part of town.
When I arrived at 2:30 a.m., the building was dark except for a singlelight in a ground floor window. Under such circumstances, many driverswould just honk once or twice, wait a minute, then drive away.
But I had seen too many impoverished people who depended on taxis astheir only means of transportation. Unless a situation smelled ofdanger, I always went to the door. This passenger might be someone whoneeds my assistance, I reasoned to myself. So I walked to the door andknocked.
"Just a minute", answered a frail, elderly voice. I could hearsomething being dragged across the floor. After a long pause, the dooropened. A small woman in her 80s stood before me. She was wearing aprint dress and a pillbox hat with a veil pinned on it, like somebodyout of a 1940s movie. By her side was a small nylon suitcase. Theapartment looked as if no one had lived in it for years. All thefurniture was covered with sheets. There were no clocks on the walls,no knickknacks or utensils on the counters.
In the corner was a cardboard box filled with photos and glassware."Would you carry my bag out to the car?" she said. I took the suitcaseto the cab, then returned to assist the woman. She took my arm and wewalked slowly toward the curb. She kept thanking me for my kindness.
"It's nothing", I told her. "I just try to treat my passengers the wayI would want my mother treated".
"Oh, you're such a good boy", she said. When we got in the cab, shegave me an address, then asked, "Can you drive through downtown?"
"It's not the shortest way," I answered quickly.
"Oh, I don't mind," she said.
"I'm in no hurry. I'm on my way to a hospice".
I looked in the rear-view mirror. Her eyes were glistening.
"I don't have any family left," she continued. "The doctor says Idon't have very long."
I quietly reached over and shut off the meter. "What route would youlike me to take?" I asked. For the next two hours, we drove throughthe city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as anelevator operator.
We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had livedwhen they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniturewarehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing asa girl. Sometimes she'd ask me to slow in front of aparticular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness,saying nothing.
As the first hint of sun was creasing the horizon, she suddenly said,"I'm tired. Let's go now."
We drove in silence to the address she had given me. It was a lowbuilding, like a small convalescent home, with a driveway that passedunder a portico. Two orderlies came out to the cab as soon as wepulled up. They were solicitous and intent, watching her every move.They must have been expecting her. I opened the trunk and took , thesmall suitcase to the door. The woman was already seated in awheelchair.
"How much do I owe you?" she asked, reaching into her purse
"Nothing," I said.
"You have to make a living," she answered.
"There are other passengers," I responded.Almost without thinking, I bent and gave her a hug. She held onto me tightly.
"You gave an old woman a little moment of joy," she said. "Thank you."
I squeezed her hand, then walked into the dim morning light. Behindme, a door shut. It was the sound of the closing of a life. I didn'tpick up any more passengers that shift. I drove aimlessly, lost inthought. For the rest of that day, I could hardly talk. What if thatwoman had gotten an angry driver, or one who was impatient to end hisshift? What if I had refused to take the run, or had honked once, thendriven away? On a quick review, I don't think that I have doneanything more important in my life
We're conditioned to think that our lives revolve around greatmoments. But great moments often catch us unaware - beautifullywrapped in what others may consider a "small one."
Shh, it's..here..
12:20 PM
today... my first prelim paper... GP!!! omg... it totally sucked!! ok, the essay was alright... but the compre? i couldn't even finish the paper!!! i actually did a textual analysis and guess what? no time to finish!!! argh!!! so much for being obedient... but it's not like i prepared a lot anyway... all the preparation i did was just homework... but still... i didn't expect ti to turn out this bad... *cries* guess i'll hafta do amazingly well for my essay in order to pass... which is... err... highly unlikely... math this thursday... hopefully things will be better for me... math is after all my pet subject...
Shh, it's..here..
2:16 PM
Friday, August 20, 2004
i got this from the japan reference forum...
A Parent Guide to JRock...
1) Don't worry, your kid probably isn't gay, even though the pics hanging next to their bed looks like girls.
2) Don't get your kid an English CD for their birthday or any other gift giving holiday, they probably won't like it.
3) When they show you a pic of their favorite singer, don't instantly assume that it's a girl, it probably isn't.
4) If you walk into the room while they are on the computer and they minimize the window instantly, don't be offended, it's probably for your own protection.
5) Don't be suprised if their total clothing and make-up style changes
6) If they start speaking a language that is almost English, but not quite, don't worry. Its called "Engrish". You'll get used to it.
7) Don't insult their favorite J-Rockers.
8) When they start talking about Lucifer, they aren't worshiping Satan.
9) Buy more ink jet cartridges for the printer, the more pics the fan has, the happier they will be.
10) Don't be suprised when you can no longer talk to your child about anything except Japan.
11) Be prepared to learn more than you ever had, about something you never wanted to know about.
12) A man in a dress is sexy, no matter what you say, nothing can change that.
13) Don't correct them when they spell the name "hide" with a lower case h, that's how it's done.
14) When they collect scrap fabrics to make plushies, don't worry, they aren't practicing voodoo.
15) It doesn't matter that they don't know what the singers are saying, don't bother arguing about it.
16) J-Rock isn't a phase and they won't grow out of it.
Shh, it's..here..
1:49 PM
ok so i'm slacking in school now... have i forgotten all bout prelims? nopez... just that i don't feel like doing any work now... will do so later... when i go to mr lee's place... we'll be having gp later... sigh... boring... dunno if i should go? i really really don't feel like going... but i'll prolly end up going anyway... heh.
woo-hoo i got HYDE!! hahaha... but the lack of pictures is rather disappointing...
Hyde! That's right, that sexay lead singer from
L'arc~en~Ciel. A nice, easygoing, very good
looking guy, don't you think? And that deep
voice...yum yum yum. You probably like your men
a little on the mature side (or, if you're a
guy, you are on the mature side.) He was my
first Jrock obsesee. Yay for Hyde!
Which J-rock boi is for you? (or, if you're a guy..which irresistable shonen are you?)
brought to you by Quizilla
Shh, it's..here..
12:51 PM
Wednesday, August 18, 2004
quiz again!!
Ryuuseigun
which sad j-pop song are you? brought to you by Quizilla
Shh, it's..here..
10:18 AM
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
i should be in physics lecture now... but decided to give it a miss... i find it rather impossible for them to teach design experiments in lectures anyway... so why bother going... anyway i seriously think i'm coming down with a flu... now not only is my voice dead, i'm coughing non stop and my nose has been blocked since i woke up this morning... *cries* i just hope it doesn't develop into anything worse... *prays*
| You Are Gilbert From "What's Eating Gilbert Grape?"
You are very giving and self-sacrificing. You're always there to lend a helping hand to family and friends. However, this generous nature often robs you of fulfilling your needs and desires, and may cause you to become resentful. Find a way to balance your kindness with your independence. |
Take The Johnny Depp Quiz!ooh... johnny depp!!
Shh, it's..here..
9:34 AM
Monday, August 16, 2004
i'm seriously falling sick... saturday i had a splitting headache which lasted the whole day... sunday i woke up and my throat felt horrible... today my voice is totally gone... i just hope i don't fall ill during prelims... oh well... leng sim isn't in school today... evil girl left me all alone in school... so anyway...
[saturday]
i'd not blog bout saturdays (since all my saturdays are the same...) if not for this incident... after mass, louisa and i were going home together... we were walking to the bus stop when suddenly louisa went oh shit! i left my wallet in church! we went back to get it... but the church was already locked... except for one door which lead to the upper level of the church... but her wallet happened to be on the lower level... so we went to look for fr joe to get the keys from him... but the door leading to the lower level refused to open!! we tried like 2 or 3 doors?? but to no avail... argh... we were like climbing up and down the stairs and it was damn hot!! so finally we went to find fr joe again and he let us in through another door... sigh... so much trouble just for a wallet... louisa, louisa... so forgetful... tsk tsk...
[sunday]
went for the youth ministry fair today... was supposed to give a 1 to 3 min presentation about the choir... but i think my presentation didn't even last 1 min... super short... we had free lunch!! so anyway... we were getting rather bored tending to the booth... coz hardly anyone came... probably because the elaborate john 10:10 booth were blocking our rather empty one... so louisa decided to entertain herself my vandalising my body... she took out my markers and wrote HYDE on my left arm and HALMM on my right hand... (the halmm word is still faintly there by the way...) we managed to get 2 new members! haha... oh and for dinner i had sushi!! at sembawang shopping centre's sakae sushi... with adam, fabian and sherry... the place was damn high tech... there was a computer at every table for us to place our orders... naturally we had lotsa fun with it...cracking lame jokes and all... all of us were laughing like mad!!
[today]
ms ho isn't in school... so no gp... well there was but we were just supposed to do some discussion which was crap... we ended up discussing bout kumar? and his future son? damn lame... like he didn't consider the possibility that he'd have daughters? haha... yeah... i suppose that's it... for now... not much has happened today yet for me to blog about...
Shh, it's..here..
1:24 AM
Saturday, August 14, 2004
i got this from samantha's blog... a good read...
I ran into a stranger as he passed by, "Oh excuse me please" was my reply. He said, "Please excuse me too; I wasn't watching for you." We were very polite, this stranger and I. We went on our way and we said good-bye. But at home a different story is told, How we treat our loved ones, young and old. Later that day, cooking the evening meal, My son stood beside me very still. When I turned, I nearly knocked him down. "Move out of the way," I said with a frown. He walked away, his little heart broken. I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken. While I lay awake in bed, God's still small voice came to me and said, "While dealing with a stranger, common courtesy you use, but the family you love, you seem to abuse. Go and look on the kitchen floor, You'll find some flowers there by the door. Those are the flowers he brought for you. He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue. He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise, you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes." By this time, I felt very small, And now my tears began to fall. I quietly went and knelt by his bed; "Wake up, little one, wake up," I said. "Are these the flowers you picked for me?" He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree. I picked 'em because they're pretty like you. I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue." I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today; I shouldn't have yelled at you that way." He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay. I love you anyway." I said, "Son, I love you too, and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."
Shh, it's..here..
12:30 AM
feast your eyes!!
Shh, it's..here..
12:01 AM
at long last, coursework is finally over... whew... ok my program was erm... not very good... but it's over!! that's all that matters right? but... looks like i'll hafta mug like mad for my theory papers... coz i screwed up 2 out of 3 courseworks... sucks man... sigh... haven't got much to blog about at the moment... oh ya... during coursework i almost had a heart attack!! i was like done with all my stuff so i saved everything into my diskette to go to the comp with printer to print... when i opened my stuff... *gasp* all the edits i've done during the entire session was GONE!!! and i couldn't remember all of them coz i asked mr yit for help... plus there was pratically no time left!! i got the shock of my life man!! how could i not save?? impossible!! then i went back to check the C drive of my comp... whew! a sense of relief washed over me... i transferred the wrong files into the diskette... gosh... imagine if i really didn't save my stuff... anyway, mrs tee is the nicest teacher on earth!! she's so nice man!! i was having some problems with my coursework and she came to help... and in no time at all my program was running almost perfectly!! so nice right? she helped me for free!! (i.e., she isn't gonna deduct any marks from me for getting help) xiaoxuan had lotsa problems too... she couldn't even compile her program! so mrs tee was like hey hey look at ashley's! her's works! then she shifted my monitor slightly so that xiaoxuan would be able to see... that oh-so-righteous me yit would NEVER do that!! why can't there be more teachers like her...
Fate:
Tetween the freezing needle leaf trees
fate deeply running through
vainly holding hope close
Burning into the storm's whirpool
Ah, the light is growing faint
Ah, shout of my heartbeat
So painfully I love you
This arm, this heart
Beyond the land, beyond my heart
For the sake of the one precious to me?
Beyond the long rail, who's the one that's laughing?
When will I be fully forgiven?
When is the end going to come?
Not coming to a stop, can't escape it
Manipulated by illusion
Only by feeling for the way I keep on running
I fear that from now on all I do will be mistakes
What is love?
What is a lie?
I don't understand
Heartless time is pressing
Now the silence is cut off
Now I go down and stand to them....ah
Now the target is decided
In the moment I take great care to do it
Faster than anyone if I ran through the dark
So painfully I love you
This arm, this heart
Freezing so much, trembling so much
Only you, only you
When spring will come
When the night turns to daylight
To that sky, in that place
Faster than anyone
If I ran through the dark
I wonder, is it truly concluded?
What is love?
What is a lie?
I don't understand....
All I know is that it's only you that I love
Shh, it's..here..
12:45 PM
Thursday, August 12, 2004
argh... tired... just came out of math lecture... was copying copying everything... woah... my hand nearly died... anyway... was watching singapore idol and amazing race last night... singapore idol was totally retarted!! yikes... ok, i'll hafta say some were really good... or i'd be unfair to them right? but most of them were totally crap... the stupid banana man... omg!! he's just wasting everyone's time... and the judges are like kinda rude... amazing race was good. marshall and lance are finally out... they suck!! they should have been out long ago man!! yeah... prelims are next next week... scary?? supposed to be i think... but i'm just not feeling it... i'm like still enjoying myself... haha... like i know it's coming real soon but i'm still not affected by the fact that it's like almost here... and i'm having my last coursework session tomorrow... seriously hope i can get my program working the way it's supposed to work... it's only a few of us who haven't finished it yet... i think...
Shh, it's..here..
8:07 PM
Monday, August 09, 2004
new lay!! my blog's pretty again!! hehe... i couldn't wait till after my prelims to do it... i just had to!! and i managed to find something pretty!!
Shh, it's..here..
6:31 PM
yay!! it's national day!! not that it really matters much to me... but i'm really really grateful for the long weekend... 4 whole days of NO SCHOOL!!! heh... so i'm watching the parade now... basically it's the same thing as every year... anyway i realised i haven't been blogging for a few days... again... yeah so on friday i watched laruku's shibuya 7 days concert on vcd... OMGGM!!!! it was awesomely, rockingly, fantastically, superbly good!! hyde was damn cool man!! gosh... i had insomnia after that! yeah basically that's all i can remember for friday... saturday... the usual... novena, tuition, choir, mass. after that we went to eat vegetarian food for dinner. surprising huh? for such a meat eater like me... as for yesterday, i just slacked the day away... yeah... i went to orchard today!! haha... can't believe my prelims are only like 2 weeks away... and i'm still having fun... so anyway, i went to borders today... bought raymond e feist's magician: apprentice. but i'm not gonna read it till after exams... must try my best to control!! then we went to nooch for lunch. i had ramen!! yummy...
Shh, it's..here..
12:18 AM
Friday, August 06, 2004
haha... i ended up doing quizez instead!! this is really addictive!!
Shh, it's..here..
12:02 AM
*yawn* i just stepped into the house... sleepy... went to watch adam's band performance at victoria concert hall... the were damn good!! really enjoyed all the wonderful music they played... the vocals weren't that good though... they need to train more... yeah so anyway, after the concert we went to some place to eat porridge... i hardly ate though... coz i wasn't hungry and the porridge was full of ginger. yuck!! i hate ginger!!
i'm tired... today was a really long day... was in school till like 4.30... then daddy drove me home where i showered and had my dinner... then i was off to the concert... and back only now... and i've gotta wake up at 5.30 to go to school tomorrow. how nice. we'll be having national day celebrations tomorrow... i'll be wearing red to school!! haha... oh and we'll be having our last session on coursework tomorrow too... coursework really sucks to the core!! i'm down to my last session and my program still can't be run yet... perfect! just perfect!! i'm so gonna die i tell you... i've still got 2 errors to deal with and after that, there's still no guarantee that the thing will work as it's supposed to... *cries*
ok, i best be off now... if not i'll either fall asleep in front of the computer or oversleep and be late for school tomorrow...
Shh, it's..here..
10:18 PM
Monday, August 02, 2004
i wanna get a new phone... coz since my plan finishes end of the month... thought of getting 3200 initially but now i think it doesn't look that nice... 6220 sounds good...
integrated digital camera, WAP 2.0 over GPRS / EDGE,XHTML browser, Presence-enhanced contacts. but i looks almost similar to my current 6610... thought of trying somthing new...
this looks really attractive!! panasonic X66... with camera and all... and it's tiny too!!
samsung SGH-E100A... this is lovely... but unfortunately it doesn't have a camera... don't think i'll be getting this...
Shh, it's..here..
12:12 PM
argh!! what's with this photobucket.com bandwith exceeded!!! stupid... my blog doesn't look nice anymore... and i don't have the time to do anything bout it... at least till after my prelims?? yeah guess so... sigh... guess i'll just hafta live with it for the moment... anyway i haven't blogged in a while... nothing much to blog about anyway... life's pretty boring... prelims are in 2 weeks... ya...
Shh, it's..here..